Much of workplace relationship need not turn sour if we could manage our anger pretty well. Anger is the most easily expressed emotion anywhere in the world and it poses a great danger if not properly addressed. The difference between anger and danger is the letter ‘D’.
Anger is a response to an unmet expectation-Bernard Golden; PhD. It can also be an expression of anxiety, confusion, embarrassment, frustration, jealousy, loss, rejection, stress, threat and so on. It has an escalation effect from small triggers to acute rage. Everyone gets angry and this makes anger a normal emotion but anger becomes a problem when it becomes too intense and frequent, last too long, leads to aggression and begin to disrupt relationship at work.
We must learn to solve and not create problems with anger. A boxer in a ring fights for money and medal via anger. What do you get when you throw tantrums in the work place or bang the door on your boss? A male employee said to his female manager; I have your type at home! He regretted throwing that temper tantrum. He went back to his wife jobless!
Anger appear in many forms and can be chronic; ongoing resentment, volatile; explodes as physical or verbal aggression, judgmental, passive; expressed indirectly through sarcasm, overwhelming, retaliatory, self inflicted; negative self-talk, starvation, suicidal ideation or completed suicide and constructive; making positive difference.
Depending on the situation, there are different ways of managing anger so it doesn’t get the worst out of you;
1. Impulse control: pulse; think before acting in order to make the best choice.
2. Venting: Putting up a fight either verbally or physically; this does not necessarily get anger out of your system; rather the emotion gets stronger
3. Suppressing; ‘Avoiding the issue’ this will eventually have a boomerang effect.
4. Processing; angry parties meet to objectively analyse the situation. Other approaches includes; focusing on an opposite emotion, using trigger awareness as walk-away cue, and exploring relaxation techniques.
To manage anger, stop blaming others and take responsibility for it. No blame game!
Express your feelings politely and then try to work things out. Stop telling others to calm down or shut up, it will aggravate issues. Mind your thoughts, words, and actions. Assess what is bugging you, how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? how much is it worth? Back off and keep your cool. Resolve the source of your irritation and if you feel yourself getting angry, take a good break and talk another day.
For classes on anger management, feel free to contact us!